Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Welcome!
So, here we are. In a nutshell, way to many women are not enjoying sex (60-70% according to my Doctor and various reliable sites), and that's just wrong! I decided that we need a safe place to talk about our sexual frustrations, experiences, get support, advice, and information. Questions and comments are encouraged (this is a blog).
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Note: We live in a sexually "free-for-all" country, but some folks still live by and teach values that prohibit sex outside of marriage. I am one of those people. Many disagree with me. That's to be expected, and I won't argue with you if you disagree. If you feel the need to flame me because your opinion differs from mine, then remember these internet-based words of wisdom,
"Arguing on the internet is like competing in the Special Olympics. Even if you win, you're still retarded."
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Some women do not enjoy sex because they believe it is sinful to do so. Some young women are taught to be chaste and abstain from sex until marriage. This, from my point of view, is wonderful. A problem does arise, however, when ultra-conservative parents bombard their little girls with a completely negative outlook towards sex.
Many girls go into marriage having heard only how "bad" sex is, and believe that it is not ok to enjoy it. Some are taught that its sole purpose is reproduction. Others may also believe that it is a duty they owe to their husbands by virtue of the marriage vows ("love, honor and 'obey'). What woman can enjoy sex when she is taught about it in that light?!
Teaching our daughters that it is wrong to have sex outside of marriage is fine, but they also need to hear that sex within a marriage is good. It is not a duty to one's husband. It is an act that brings a woman closer to him. Sex is not just for makin' babies, it's something you can do with your husband just because the two of you feel like it and just because it feels good!
Parents need to remember to talk about sex in a positive light to their children, and teach them that is something to be enjoyed when the time is right. This will curb the "sex is always a sin" mentality. It may also help women not feel ashamed to communicate with their husbands if they are feeling little to no pleasure during sex.
Good points. If I had it to do over again, I might have abstained before marriage too. My religious beliefs are definitely of that flavor.
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